 This one's eyes are dead, but this one's eyes are alive. What do you call her?
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| — Sal, "Demotion". |
Salvatore "Sal" Kazlauskas was an employee of Cloud 9 Store 1217. He was known for his "general creepiness" and appeared very interested in children and women. His body was found behind a wall in the store in the Fall of 2017. He is portrayed by actor Sean Whalen.
Character History[]
Season One[]
Take the creepiness down...
Sal first appears in background during Jonah Simms first day as an employee at Cloud 9. ("Pilot") He is present in the Break Room eating grapes during Glenn's speech on Cloud 9's magazine Stratus and the arrival of a reporter for the magazine. Glenn asks Sal to take the "creepiness" down to a "two". Sal has no reply and just stares at Glenn. In the Stock Room, he tries to get Jonah to chug cream sodas and eggnog. Later, Sandra (perhaps falsely) admits that she and Sal are having sex in the dressing rooms ("Magazine Profile"). Sandra later complains Sal is sexually harassing her, but is ignored ("Shots and Salsa").
What do you call her?
Sal's next appearance is during an interview with Amy and Glenn for the position of assistant manager. Amy comments that his resumé includes a lot of experience "watching children". Sal is very interested in the pictures of Glenn's children that are on his desk. Sal asks for one of the children's name which Amy stops Glenn from providing ("Demotion"). As Garrett films Cheyenne's false labor (unaware it is being broadcast on the stores's TVs) Sal is seen intensely watching a TV ("Labor").
Season Two[]
Yikes!
Sal does not appear in Season Two but is mentioned. Amy tells Todd to keep Sal away from the womenswear section and women in general ("Back to Work"). Joel sees a flyer on the bulletin board and mentions to Amy that Sal is looking for a roommate ("Black Friday").
Season Three[]
Sal is found dead when construction is done on the store after the tornado. He was behind drywall drilling a hole into the women's bathroom when his foot became stuck on a crossbeam and he couldn't escape. Glenn reports he died of starvation and Dina says he was dead for over a year before being discovered. In Sal's locker, Dina discovers wigs, baby teeth, batteries, a dead turtle and a book Sal was writing. Sal's passport is also found which Mateo plans to use to go to the Philippines. After Cheyenne makes Mateo's face up to look like Sal, she quizzes him on Sal's particulars. Sal was born in South Dakota and visited Thailand annually. Dina and a customer dressed as a coroner carry Sal's body until it is dumped in a Halloween display where the real coroner finds it ("Sal's Dead"). Laurie asks Amy about all the sexual harassment complaints in Sal's personnel file until Amy points out Sal is dead ("District Manager"). Jeff wears a disguise including Sal's name tag in order to sneak into the town hall ("Town Hall").
Trivia[]
- Amy approaches Dina during ("Brett Is Dead") and mentions that women are complaining about a foul smell in the women's restroom, foreshadowing the discovery of Sal's body in the wall.
- Stuck in the store during a blizzard, Cheyenne suggests doing a Ouija board but Garrett mentions that Sal died in the store and he doesn't want to talk to him. ("Blizzard")
- Sal's surname, "Kazlauskas", most likely comes from John Kazlauskas, a writer for the show.
